Nature

the joy I feel when I see the green blossoming. after the rain falls and nature seems to breathe again. and thrive and grow and bloom. Bradford on avon is a haven for nature. humans seem to be kept in the background. somehow we don’t penetrate and destroy. except when the selfish ones arrive and pollute and desecrate the peace and tranquility.

I often find myself pausing my run to capture another image of perfection provided by mother nature. no wonder artists are drawn to nature so often. I think of sarah and her botanical pursuits. the richness of the colors and the lush power of the ink as it forms the shapes we so often miss around us.

when I wrote that song “its like she knows” with phil it was my offering to mother nature. for all the pain and hurt we’ve caused her. theres a line it that says her world is aching her heart is breaking.

and thats the sensation I feel. like we’re breaking her. trampling her grace and beauty underneath our hurrying, desperate feet. 

and yet I know she is far more powerful than we can ever hope to be. for every factory we build, she’ll retaliate with a typhoon that will destroy it and the people inside it. or maybe she doesn’t retaliate. maybe she just is. and that’s a lesson for us. why do we keep building and wasting and destroying and killing and pilfering? haven’t we learned that it’s enough? we have more than we’ll ever ned. mother nature gives us so much all the time. and still we’re not satisfied. human beings. parasites intent on destruction.

the amazon. that marvelous gift from mother nature. it gives us the air we need to breathe. plants to feed from. shelter from the sun. 

but oh no. let’s destroy it. tear it down, burn it. because we can. we’re so powerful right? we created fire and machines and chainsaws and armies and police and weapons of mass destruction. but once it’s gone so will we be. mother nature will re invent long after we’re gone. but we’ll be finished. can’t we see that? isn’t that enough to stop us?

I wrote that furiously without stopping.

time for peace now.

I love to lie down in the grass. the warmth of the sun on my skin. the hive of activity around me. ants building nicely, cooperating with each other. the bees busy helping everyone. the birds swooping in and out, high and low, shrieking, playing, communicating. the midges that refuse to budge as I come loping along oblivious to my annoyance as they penetrate my skin or investigate the inside of my mouth.

the little avenues to the river from the main path. luring me in. beseeching me to walk on it. to feel the texture of the grass under my feet and admire the beauty of the gentle current. the riverbank that invites me to rest and be quiet and admire the gifts in from of me. all the things that don’t require money to corrupt and toxify our minds. such peace. such tranquility. such serenity. I crave it. I yearn for it. I desire it.

I hope I can stay at one with nature when I return to california. it’s there waiting for me. I Just need to go find it, be in it, revel in it. I want to leave the streets and find the woods. bask in the glorious sunshine while drawing my hand slowly over the buds and leaves and branches. get up high and look down on the city. find the still. avoid the noise. 

we make so much noise. all the time. why can’t we shut up? my dad is struggling with noise these days. more than before. it’s had a profound effect on me. he may not like his reaction to loud noise but it helps remind me how unnecessary and unhealthy it is. we’re not meant to sit there amidst the din. we’re supposed to find the still. 

why are all the zen masters so much happier and gentle and kind? because they are finding peace and tranquility on a regular basis. they work for it but the rewards are so rich and immense.

nature can provide. nature does provide. as long as we realize and respect and give back she will continue to do so. But she must be getting sick of us by now. There she is feeding the animals we then feast on and destroy. “Hold on she thinks…I have more than enough for you to never go hungry”..but you want to round up these magnificent creatures, force them into a space as a form of torture and then celebrate their painful and unnecessary deaths at a table along with your glasses made in factories by a child who should surely be learning about the joys of the world?

we don’t make much sense. surely human are the most intelligent creatures on the planet? surely right? ”we have the biggest brains”…”we’ve invented things”..”you’re as dumb as an animal”…really?

I bet the animals are thinking..”wow..how dumb can they be?”..”why are they cutting down another tree?” “why are they killing all my brothers and sisters?” “why are they killing themselves?” “I thought they were smart. I thought they were the most evolved?”…”thats what they keep proclaiming to themselves.”

when you stop and think and listen it all becomes so clear. 

I am so blessed to have grown up in the countryside. it gave me a love for nature that sits deep within. I haven’t always honored that love. but I try not to regret. only to see it as a lesson going forwards. and the gift that arrived in the form of an extended stay here in wiltshire with my parents has allowed my mind and heart to open up and once again admire and appreciate the beauty all around me.

as I type I turn to my right. out of the window I see the vibrant colors of the copper beach. the spire emerging behind the dense green. and the car that makes its way along the narrow road suddenly looks small and insignificant as nature rises above it. and the human being walking towards me so tiny in stature beneath the magnificent trees and cloudy sky. the only eyesore being the nasty drab cable that penetrates the view. we’ve never found a way to hide that ugliness. sometimes as I take photos I try to frame the picture to exclude them. but sometimes it’s impossible. they won’t go away. the worst of the photo bombers.

nature. just say the word out loud. such a beautiful sensation. onomatopoeia ..I love that word too. I don’t find it easy to say but I love it. and nature personifies it. nature. it’s hard to say it abrasively. it won’t let you. try it. I dare you!

nature..can I rhyme it? can I get it in a song? maybe I need to place it in the middle of the sentence? or I need to let go of that urge to make it rhyme exactly and gently allow the next line to end with a word that is similar. or maybe I don’t need to rhyme at all? stop trying to control the situation james.

humming. the humming bird. there’s another joyous set of words that nature provided. the buzzing of the bees. the swooping of the swallows. the darting of the swifts. the blooming of the roses.

recently I have begun to read out loud again frequently. and I have remembered how much I enjoy it. the way you get to pronounce certain words and phrase certain sentences.

and here I am writing words about nature. or things associated with my thoughts on nature. what a gift.

yesterday as I was running I stopped and begun to admire. it was addictive. I couldn’t stop. I could have gone on for hours. photograph after photograph. then stopping and sitting and listening and admiring. and being still.

california. the golden state. nature at its most glorious all around me. I have to remember that I wrote this. all the gifts and things that I actually need to be happy lie in wait for me when I return. as long as I remember to explore what mother nature has laid out for me. respectfully, quietly, with reverence. 

and I must allow nature to influence my songs. to penetrate my conciousness when I write. I remember the feeling as we wrote “it’s like she knows”. I felt like I was givng back. I was listening and being compassionate to her needs. it’s so overwhelming trying to comprehend what to do to help stop the destruction. well one way I can help is to write about it and hope that someone listens. and if they don’t it doesn’t matter. at least I will be thinking about it. and by thinking about it I can figure out how to help in the most productive healing way.

I was listening to Greta Thunberg the other day. The 1975 have sampled her speech on their opening track. She says that “the situation is black and white. and saying it isn’t is a very dangerous lie”…that line has haunted me ever since. but it has woken me up to the need to do more. and as I walk around this relatively untainted haven here in wiltshire I see mother nature in all her glory. I see how we can co-exist. people here care. they respect her. they admire her. they live here but they do it in a way that feels respectful. its never loud here. it’s calm. it’s peaceful. like nature is. and when it isn’t its unsettling. like nature is.

when nature reacts she reacts violently. her violence is as painful and horrid as human violence is. physical, mental or emotional violence. it’s echoed in a hurricane or a tsunami. death, destruction, chaos, confusion and broken people follow in its wake. Like they do when humans do it to each other. but we can’t control mother nature. but we can change ourselves.

I think we can learn so much from nature. we need to admire it’s infrastructure. it’s all around us. for every building we build there’s one out there built quicker and with more grace and an eye for it’s design. think of the spider’s web shimmering on a wet but bright morning you uncover as you walk between two trees. or the ant hill being built quietly and with enormous efficiency beneath us constantly. the bee hive with its societal order. a queen bee who gives back. workers who give to survive. the way bird builds her nest with only her beak and claws as a tool. the mole. avoiding the bright lights and emerging only when it’s safe and relatively calm.

I would love a garden. so I can learn how it works. and let things grow like they should. when I see my parents in their garden I see two happy people. they work as a team. they are content. they may struggle at times but they gain their rewards and they respect mother nature. and she respects them back. every time I step outside now I see the fruits of their labors emerging. No-one here needed to be congratulated. 

Just quietly go about your business and help the earth. and if you do she will give you back everything you need. she will love us if we love her. We are but tiny specks. we must remember that. grandiosity and conceit have driven us to to the edge. We still have time. But not a lot. All the things we think we need we really don’t. Its time to give back. to remember our place and be kind and gentle. To ourselves. to the animals and insects and to mother nature. she will provide but she’s almost had enough. She will survive. if we don’t wake up and listen and do what’s needed to be done we won’t. its that simple.